Conflicting Kingdoms

Dark Halo Image Quest Britannica.com

When I woke up this morning, the first email I read in my comfortable bed was discussing ISIS and the people trying to escape cruelty for a better life.  My mind started spinning as I went from these large world issues, to remembering/praying for the life issues that those around me are currently carrying and then moving from there I went into an even smaller arena - to my personal issues that I bring before the Lord.  As I went from there into quiet time, I prayed these thoughts:

Lord, these life issues seem larger than I am.  While I don't want to be callous to what is going on, worldwide, I also need to see your hand in our personal individual lives.  I know that you love us and you are up to something larger than we can imagine but I need You personally, my loved ones need You and our world at large need You.

After doing my quiet time, I went for a run and decided to listen to a sermon instead of music.  It was Todd Hunter's sermon:

Kingdoms In Conflict - September 6, 2015

If you listen to the first five minutes of this sermon you will see that it ends up being a direct conversation with my prayer this morning.  It was also a reminder that my prayer, isn't a new prayer nor will it be an old prayer.  Because of this we do not need to lose heart.  If your heart resonates with this prayer I would encourage you to listen to the whole sermon as Todd reminds us of who God is in the midst of world and personal chaos, the need for the church and finally for personal devotion to God.

In Christ,

Romans 7 & 8 Part 1

In the past few weeks I've really been captured by the end of Romans 7 and all of Romans 8.  In the following video, I begin to discuss some of the things that I've learned by reflecting on these passages.

http://somup.com/coQVrqoSy

Enjoy.

In Christ,

Intersection of Grace

 

Sometimes God places you in moments where He takes your breath away and you feel separated from time and space, while at the exact same time very present to the moment at hand.  He recently took me into one of those scenarios.  While the moment only lasted but a few minutes I knew that it was from Him and that a shifting within me had taken place.

Sometimes we go through seasons in our live that are life-changing.  Sometimes we pray prayers that feel empty and feel like they fall to the ground; that they are unheard by heaven.  If I could give you one piece of advice for your life during those times it would be this:  

Hang on.   

You are heard,

you are seen, 

and you are known.

God rarely moves in the ways that I "expect" or have been "taught to expect."  He, however, does move!  I am learning to see Him completely differently and expect Him completely differently and it has drawn me to a closer understanding of Him and has shown me how to be at peace in the present - even if the present makes no sense.

The foundation of this life change has been believing that He is good.  Truly good, truly loving - always - no matter what circumstances dictate or show.  As the picture that accompanies this post shows, our past, our present and our future all intersect in the cross.  For me, that is the foundation of this love. We have to start at the cross and allow it to be what defines and shapes our lives.  Our past and present have a profound affect on our present day life but these areas should be shaped and rearranged by the cross.

My prayer for you is that you would breathe deep His grace in your present moment.  He has invited you to enjoy today, to know Him - today and be loved by Him - today.  Let your past and future be shaped in the understanding that He loves you.  And know that those big, unanswered questions are heard.  It is likely He may answer those questions, not in the way you expect, but rather through an invitation to rest in the security of His character in a manner that heals the past, holds the present and gives you peace for the future.

In Christ,

Strands of Love

As a writer, I always struggle with what to share because I want to say something that is authentic.  I also struggle with wanting something that others can relate to so that those who take time to read what I write find their time well spent.  As I wrestled through how/what to say for this post I had an image of strands of thread.  All I can offer you is a beautiful strand - it doesn't amount to much when it stands on its own, but if you can take a strand or two of mine and combine it with other strands that you yourself hold in your hand, then perhaps, out of those strands something beautiful can be weaved.

In this post, I want to look at how relationships can lead us to a deeper understanding of God's love towards us.  I know that not everyone has experienced positive examples of these types of love, but that is why we should glean from others when possible.

So here are a couple strands for you to add to the life experiences that you yourself hold.

Parental Love Strand:

I had a heart-rattling dream where my son was lost for a day-and-a-half.  The emotional upheaval of thinking he was dead really shook me.  During the dream I made the statement, "How can I live without him?"  In the rawness of that dream, I realized how deeply entrenched the parent/child relationship is - there is no ceremonial moment of declaration for this love - it just is.  This child, who is birthed out of you and becomes a separate, individual person, is deeply connected to your heart. 

In awe of this love, I stepped back to reflect on the fact that our God declares that He is our Father and we are His children.  I know that the pain in my heart from a nightmare (that I got to wake up from - and not everyone gets to wake up from) is only a mere droplet of God's heart for us.

Where did humanity come from? 

It was birthed out of the heart of God. 

How can I live without them?

 Maybe, just maybe, this is a small glimpse of how our Heavenly Father longs after us.  We, who were created in His image - individual and separate yet deeply connected to His heart. It isn't through ceremony nor anything that we have done. Perhaps seeing Him as Father, through His eyes (instead of looking upward as a child) will help you to see how full of love He is for you, His child.

Marital Love Strand:

I'm coming up on 14 years of marriage and I love it.  I've been to two weddings recently and each time I hear those vows repeated they hold so much more meaning.  You realize that in that moment you had no idea what you were actually declaring, yet how true each and every word would need to be to carry you through life.

I found love on a swing

I found love on a swing.  I was young, he was young.  I remember the sun setting and the rocks tickling between my toes.

As the metallic chains twisted we talked about life.  He said, "What's the point of dating if it's not the person you plan to be with all your life?"

We were young.  How could we know what life and love would throw our way?

We are still young, I'm sure in many ways but in other ways I feel we stand at a crossroads: watching our grandparents teetering at the end of life.  Watching our parents whom we remember as young as us entering "old age." The letting go of today and welcoming the unknown.  We see our kids young and impetuous, full of life and dreams yet just starting to touch their toes to reality of hardships that life brings.  And in this place of middleness, I remember finding love on a swing.  The words and promises that were made without knowing the depths it would take us.  The snapshot of perfection in time.  I know that I was given a gift from above.  A gift that undergirds my entire life.  

I found love on a swing; it is such a gift to me.

There is something about marital love that is unique and special.  Unlike parental love, it emerges from a choice that we make after we learn more about the other person.  It is a type of love that strengthens and deepens with time.  God has invited us to not only know Him as our Heavenly Father but we have also been invited to be the Bride of Christ.  This next type of love, is an invitation for us to know Him more deeply, to experience everyday life with Him.  Yes, there are moments of declaration of this love, but only time lives out the reality of this love.

Lo, I am with you always, even until the end of the age.  This is the love that He has declared for you.  A love that was declared in a moment of time, yes, but also a love that walks beyond that moment with you through time.  Do you see it embedded into your life?

As I said in the beginning, these are mere strands that I offer to you.  I know that not everyone has experienced true parental love and/or marital love.  I do pray though that what you walk away with is a pinprick to stop and reflect on when you have experienced a type of love that moved you.  How has that love moved you?  Does reflecting on it give you a greater glimpse to the depths of the love that God has towards you?

In Christ,

 



Photo from:  http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/view-image.php?image=37443&picture=red-heart

Timeout for Mom

Well, Mother's Day was a test of my emotions, not because of a lack of love or appreciation from my family, rather it was due to what rose up inside of me.


"It's my party and I can cry if I want to..." would probably have been an appropriate theme song for that weekend. I don't usually need attention but something about that weekend awakened a quietly sleeping selfish beast. This beast thought: I should be served and appreciated and I shouldn't need to lift a single finger on Mother's Day weekend. (I'm just being honest.)

While this picture didn't turn out because I was trying not to squint, it does ironically capture a look at the beast.

The next day was no picnic either. After being loved on, celebrated and appreciated, you'd think it would be a beautiful day of peace and calmness where I eloquently demonstrated that I am that mother that was celebrated. But it just wasn't so.

So this morning, I had to give myself a timeout and be brought back to what I know to be true. I've prayed the prayers, "Lord, take my selfishness away. Make me patient, loving, gentle and kind!" And what I meant by that is: rip out all the evil and immediately upload the good. Do  a massive reboot today and let me look like who I really want to be in my mind. But as usual, I was reminded that just isn't how He works (at least not with me). Instead, He promised to walk with me today and teach me how to live and love by being daily transformed from inside out. Instead of the wave of a magic wand, I have to do the hard work of saying I'm sorry, asking for forgiveness and demonstrating by action that I need God to help me be a mother. So during my timeout, I went back through some old posts about what He has taught me in the past because I needed the reminder. So if you too were reminded on Mother's Day that you are far from the perfect mother and that you need God to be the builder of your home feel free to glance back with me:

10 pennies: which now reside in my pocket, 6 pennies in one and 4 in the other...

Gentleness: Oh, what a good reminder.

Training Children: Maybe better yet it should be called Training Parents.

This is a better reflection of how my family really makes me feel.

In Christ,